Monday, January 30, 2006

Goals du Jour

First, I had a little party yesterday. I'm going to go on record here as saying that one of my al time pet peeves in this life is when people tell you they are coming to something and then don't show up. Or call or email. If you are not going to come just say I can't be there. It's fine. But this person has done this twice and it is just unacceptable. Now...

I am continuing revising my first ten pages today. I know that seems silly but really you only get one chance to make that agent turn to the second page. If they turn the page, you have their attention. One page can make or break you. Isn't that odd? And you get no mulligans. I mean even on the SAT you can have do-overs as much as you want. And it's so sad when you write your heart out and someone says meh. This is the fear that keeps me from breaking out a big fat Tyvek and sending out anything. It's so much better when you go to a conference and the editor or agent you meet with is all, sure send it and here's my card so you can stick the all important "Requested" on the envelope so it bypasses the huge slush pile and starts out in the read when you get around to it pile. Even that pile isn't first rate but it's a step up.

I had another idea today for a book. I was actually trying to give an example of a one-liner blurb to someone and just threw out the first think on my mind and it turns out to be...not so bad really. Great! Just what I need, to get sidelined again! Rats!

GOAL OF THE DAY= Revise First Ten

Saturday, January 28, 2006

I'm accounted for

Okay, sticking with the Friday goal....I did in fact redo the opening scene of the novel. Mostly I cut and pasted since I think what I had was not bad. And I'll go back and torture myself a bit more but it is better. So, ha!

Since my parents are coming and I'm having a little get together at my house tomorrow there will be no goal du jour. But Monday...

Also, Netflix did me the courtesy of delievering the awesome Smilla's Sense of Snow to my door the other day. You know, my husband stutters. So I find the one movie that has for the tall, dark, handsome, total bad-ass, get the girl hero who stutters and my husband falls asleep ten minutes in. Well, Gabriel Byrne is still one of my top five Independant/ Foreign Film boyfriends.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Oh...

And as we know this blog is all about accountability and publicly humiliating myself if I do not...so my goal for the day is to redo the opening scene in the Panty book. It came to me last night what I believe it needs to read as. Somehow the opening ten pages just were not reflecting the sheer brilliance in the rest of the manuscript. So I gotta fix that.

Okay, what happened here?

I turned on the TV today while I did my quick bedroom straighten up number. And the Gilmore Girls were on! I lovvvvvve the Girls! To sort of quote from my favorite lemur in Madagascar...I love them. I loved them before I met them. You hate them compared to how much I like them! Anyway, it was that episode where the teaser is Lor waking up to all the alarm clocks and having the dream about Luke and having the twins? You know, there was sexual tension there. There was relationship angst. There was zip, there was zing, there was zest! There was kissing that looked like...kissing. Now what has happened between 2002 and this season? I mean they finally, good Lord, FINALLY get together and I've seen more zip, zing and zest in the relationship I have with my Swifer. I know there are reports the two had a massive falling out and can not stand one another. But it's called acting! ACT! You keep wondering why the Emmy nomination is alluding you? Well, I'm not seeing it this year that's for sure. Can't the Paladinos just lock these two crazy kids in a suite in Kauai for four days with a bunch of champagne and see what develops?

And then I had a horrifying thought...Lane and Zack broke up as you all know. Thus the band is caput. Does this mean that we will never see Gil again? Hey, weekly my husband and I throw up our arms and do the wave to the awesomeness that is Sebastian Bach. So here's how I'm going to roll if this does not get resolved and Hep Alien doesn't do a reunion tour pronto.
1) Dress completely in black including camo face paint
2) Take an affordable flight to LA, preferably in at least business class
3) Rent a sub-compact which they will not have at Hertz and upgrade me to the larger model at no extra cost
4) Drive over to the Sherman-Paladino residence
5) Scale the security fence and break-in using a nail file and that thing that I tighten the screws in my glasses with
6) Ask Amy to correct this regrettable oversight
7) If she refuses, bitch slap her into compliance

And if this actually happens by some disturbed fan and they try and blame me it so wasn't me since I have a toddler and could not possibly get away for a weekend in Las Angeles. Which is exactly what it would have to be since we all know the stupid Saturday lay over scam that isn't supposed to exist anymore.

I mean what's next? My beloved Paul Anka getting run over?

What the heck was that?

No, really. I zipped through my tivoed Lost episode tonight. I have no idea what any of it meant. I'm a seriously addicted fan but I'm, er, Lost. See what I did there? Oh, never mind. I get that the piano symbolized something about family or something and the brother and the religious imagery. But it all went weird and sideways and Twin Peaks on me with the visions of angels. Esh.

Okay, so on with the great novel du jour. I have about ten scenes written. Not good scenes but scenes. I watched an episode of the Gastineau Girls today. Man, they are just a testament to wasted space. I'm not sure what the premise is since I've only seen it that one time but were these women failed hookers? Or failed models? Or just failed human beings? It's all sort of vague. I thought they were one of those lampoon of reality shows at first. Apparently they are just stereotypes brought to life. But that's what I want my new character to be. A Gastineau girl who wakes up and decides to go...useful.

I was perusing real estate in Country Club of the South as a backdrop house for the parents. I love it there. It really is like a whole wonderland all it's own. Sigh....

Anwhoodles, maybe I'm losing my mind with the cake thing? Maybe I should just throw this on the books I'm toying with pile and proceed to the vampire book brainstorming. Or maybe I should just start on book two in the Panty series (and if you know me you know that is NOT a euphemism for anything).

Although I am starting to see a whole P&P angle out of the cake thing. No real plot or mystery but a Jane Austen moment sure. You know she's all too proud and he's all prejudice. Who he is? I have no clue. But I'm sure he'll arrive sooner or later. Although in the sort of stuff I write, maybe not. I've Netflixed P&P for inspiration . The really, really good version taht stole my heart with Colin Firth. Who stole my heart in Love Actually forever. He's totally my regency era boyfriend. Also, isn't it odd taht he played Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice and then played, well, Mr. Darcy in the movie that was based on the book that was ripped off of Pride and Prejudice? I'm sure there's some sort of record there.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Jane Austen

Who was it I was reading about the other day who just flat out said she copied Pride and Prejudice almost scene for scene. It was the Bridget Jones chick wasn't it? See, that's what happens when you die, a hundred years pass and your copyright bites the dust. I understand Gone With The Wind is out of copyright too. And the "sequel"? Oy! Allegedly her two survivng relatives (nephews?) knew the copyright was running out soon and wanted the sequel out before everyone else could write one. I suppose one can not be faulted for wanting a piece of the pie they do not deserve. Can you imagine Jane Auten's relatives being all let's get someone to write sequels to all of Jane's work. So should I copy a Jane Austen plot? Cliffhanger Abbey? How the heck am I going to work in a cake baker into her stuff? Maybe another prolific long dead writer?
No? Maybe not...

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Cake Murder Book

Okay, here's what I got so far.

The television Daddy's Spoiled Little Rich Girl (taking useless to a new level)
Cake designers (Sylvia Weinstock, The Cake Diva, etc.)
Seattle
Pregnant, teenage runaway
A Hell's Angel assistant
An old lady who runs the competiton with a dirty mouth who threatens to kill her (Think Betty White in Lake Placid)
The old lady gets killed (?)
They have to eat the evidence.

That's it. Also, I've included pertinent web links on the side here. Television without pity isn't all that pertinent other then the snarkalicious factor but it's my favorite website EVER.