Four months vegan.
Four months no processed sugar.
Twenty-four pounds lost.
Then...Halloween.
I found myself standing over the damn candy bowl at three o'clock today picking out all of the cherry Tootsie Rolls. After that I moved on to the lime ones. I was like the Miner Forty-Niner on Scooby-Doo...mineminemine!
I think at one point I started actually talking to the candy trying to get it to cough up one more pack of Sprees. I whispered sweet promises that I never intended to fufill if only one more sour apple Tootsie Pop should appear. I caressed it's black plastic purple cats begging for just a few more of those raspberry toffee thingys.
By four o'clock I thought I was about to launch myself into a full blown diabetic self-induced coma. I actually HURT. I went upstairs and laid down with the worst sugar migraine known to man. Why the hell didn't I give out raisins? Overload on raisins and what's the worst that can happen? You walk around the rest of the night trying to get at that little gob stuck to your back molar with your tongue pretty much looking like a tool all evening.
You know, I vote we return this to a pagan holiday, dance naked around a fire, drink a little grog, beat on a drum. Pagans didn't do Tootsie Rolls.
I have to go take six Tylenol now.
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